My drinking days are over–for good

Used 2014-04-016 AlKHall sobriety recovery

 

Then it hit me: I can never have another drink for the rest of my life. What a depressing thought.

The other day in a meeting, a newcomer shared that sentiment. Anyone who’s been in recovery for any amount of time can certainly appreciate that moment when the realization hits you like a truck: You can never have a sip of alcohol again. Ever.

The panic associated with that thought is so prevalent, it is no doubt one of the inspirations for the famous saying, “One Day At A Time.” The expression cautions the alcoholic: Don’t worry about not drinking for the rest of your life, just worry about not drinking today.

Three years into sobriety, i had a different reaction this time when the speaker said, “Shit! I can never have another drink for the rest of my life!?”

My first thought? “I should be so lucky.” Quickly followed by, “God willing.”

The idea that the sadness i’d made of my life as an alcoholic was over forever, put me in a good mood for the rest of the day. That the debilitating pain i felt in my bones and spread to others in my life has been eradicated as long as i don’t pick up, reassured me. The concept that i can never have another drink for the rest of my life filled me with hope.

i’ve stopped drinking–not for good, but for better.

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About Al K Hall

Like a battered drinker or a punch drunk boxer, i am here for another round. For those of you who don’t know me, i’m a semi-professional writer on the rocks and a non-practicing alcoholic (if after 30 years of practicing, you still can't do something well, it's best to just give it up). For those of you who do know me, thanks for stopping by anyway and where’s the ten bucks you owe me? Welcome to my Bar None. A hole in the wall where we can hang out and trade the kind of stories you swap only when you’ve had one too many and either can’t find your way home or are afraid to. Hell, it’s cheaper than therapy and plus the pictures are prettier. Here we’ll crack open bottles and jokes and ‘last call’ are the only dirty words you’ll never hear. Pull up a stool and make yourselves at home. http://about.me/AlKHall

Posted on April 15, 2014, in Alcoholics Anonymous, Alcoholism, Lessons in Recovery, Recovery and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. Sometimes I think of my sons weddings (the oldest is just 9 right now) and the fact that I’ll be toasting them and their brides with orange juice.. or celebrating the birth of my first grandchild with a sparkling water. It’s ok really ….

  2. Yes. The thought of not having to drink again is such a relief. Great post!

  3. I don’t think ahead like that. I’m approaching 10 years sober – at no point until possibly hitting 9 years and 6months did I really think about that as a plausible goal.

    I just don’t drink today – I can decide, if I like, that tomorrow I will drink. Today I don’t plan to – that is all I can realistically hope for

  4. Thank you for this post. I needed it tonight!

  5. “Then it hit me: I can never have another drink for the rest of my life. What a depressing thought.”

    To counter I remind myself : “I will never have another hangover for the rest of my life.” What an inspiring thought.

    • Fantastic sentiment ITSB! And thanks to Al for the post :)

    • You’re so fight. In my fight to sobriety, I finally got to the point where I could see from the beginning of the drink to the hangover and then a period of withdrawal. I’m not sad that I can’t drink anymore. I’m much happier that I can finally resist it and avoid all the crap that comes after the drink.

  6. I’ve found the easy way to deal with this:
    “I could have a drink today but I have better things to do with my time and energy. I’ll worry about tomorrow tomorrow.”

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